As Susan first heard news of a plane flying into the World Trade Tower, she was saddened to think of the  family members of those on board.  At this point, nobody knew the crash was an act of terror; all that was known was that the plane was American Airlines, Flight 11.   Susan was relieved thinking that her husband was headed to Los Angeles, not New York.  But, the more she listened to the radio about the flight, the more she started to worry.  She knew nothing of a second plane into the buildings or the other acts of terrorism; one plane crash with her husband traveling that day was enough.  She cut her errands short, went home, and she looked up his itinerary.  David was on the plane.

Within hours David’s co-workers had descended upon the house.  They also knew he was traveling on that flight.  Susan doesn’t want to relive the details of that day and I don’t blame her.  Most of us can’t imagine what Susan went through that day.  I know I would be absolutely devastated to lose my husband for any reason- but for an act of terror?  It makes his death even more senseless.

Her neighbors brought food, family planned the funeral and a friend even pulled together her son’s birthday party.  While Susan greatly appreciated everyone’s support, it wasn’t until months after her third child- a daughter- was born that the fog began to lift and she was able to feel the full appreciation of what everyone had done for her.

Susan began her journey of healing, she finally connected with another woman left widowed by the terrorist attacks:   Patti Quigley.  Both she and Patti were pregnant at the time of their husband’s deaths and they lived nearby one another outside of Boston.  Friends of both women encouraged a meeting.  However, both women hesitated to contact one another; fearful that a meeting would just be hours of rehashing the events of that terrible day.  When they did connect, it was an immediate friendship because it turned out that both women were anxious to look forward and heal versus look back and relive the sadness.

When Patti and Susan finally met, the United States was waging war on Taliban forces in Afghanistan.  Susan describes how saddened she was at the thought that more people had to die as a result of terrorism- even if they were supposed to be the “enemy”.   As the deaths of both US servicemen and civilians in Afghanistan began to climb- and more women were left widowed, Susan pondered what an Afghan widow might feel.  Did she have a support network to help her recover from her loss?  Did she have any rights to her husband’s assets or property?  As she researched the answers to these questions, she was amazed to learn that Afghan women are not entitled to any of their husband’s assets or property once he dies.  Instead, all of his assets are given to his parents or an uncle or a brother – definitely not any woman.   Due to the harsh restrictions on women’s education and women in the workplace, most of these young women/mothers are left in poverty with very few resources for making money or  feeding their children.

As the beneficiary of a community, region, and country that came together to support her and other families of 9/11, in 2002, Susan had the idea to help the life of one widow in Afghanistan and Patti was an enthusiastic supporter.  Together, Susan and Patti decided to take action.  Their original plan was that they would try to help just one Afghan widow.   Not only did they want to share with someone else the same kind of compassion and support that they received but they also wanted to impart the message that the feelings of love and loss are universal.  When all was said and done, they realized that they had enough resources not to help just one woman, but to help a multitude of women. Their non-profit venture, Beyond the 11th was born and in 2004 they had their first fund-raiser:  Susan and Patti rode their bicycles on 9/11 from Ground Zero, NYC to Boston.  Susan had never really ridden a bike for any great length or purpose before, but the NY-to-Boston fund-raiser became an annual event for Susan, cathartic in some respects and raising funds to support local organizations that provide resources to women in Afghanistan.

In 2006, although Patti had distanced herself from the venture, eager to break away from the title of 9/11 widow, they both agreed to travel to Afghanistan to meet some of the beneficiaries of their funds and be the subjects of Beth Murphy’s, of Principle Pictures, documentary.   The documentary,  Beyond Belief, was released in 2007 and chronicles a life-changing journey they made to Afghanistan to meet the Afghan widows they have worked to empower.  Strikingly was Susan’s observation at how little the Afghan widows have on which to live.

Today, Susan accomplishes her mission in two ways: increasing awareness of the desperate situation of widows in Afghanistan, and raising funds to help them. By providing grants to partner non-governmental organizations (NGOs) on the ground in Afghanistan, they fund education and income-generation opportunities that are sustainable and culturally appropriate.

Hearing Susan and Patti’s story was inspirational for many reasons.  Not only did they reach out to help others, they reached beyond the borders of the United States and helped women in a country that has been known to harbor terrorists.  They are fearless and ambitious and they reached deep down, beyond their own sadness and loss, to a compassionate place.  They became problem-solvers for people who are so far removed from the daily life in upper middle-class America.  With new babies born after the tragic loss of their husbands to terrorism, it would have been easy, understandable, acceptable for them to have merely focused on rebuilding their part of the world and to have the strength to carry on and create a new life for themselves and their children.  Instead, they rose above their despair.  They looked internally at their own needs, their insecurities, and their pain and need to heal.  They looked around them, at all the people who descended upon them in their time of need.  They thought about the support they received from the community, friends, family, people they didn’t know and people they might not even recognize today.  And, they decided to channel their emotions to give to other women in need.  They went beyond their own grief.  To read more and to get involved visit the website: Beyondthe11th.org

This blog, The Inspired Mom, was born out of the concept that there must be more moms like myself.  Who had an idea, a dream, a goal and they might need some support in order to pursue their ventures.   In fact, the very reason I was able to reach my goal was because I had a support network of friends and family who wanted to see me achieve my goals.  Even though I have launched my website, I still have a huge journey ahead of me.  I need to get out there and market my book.  This is not something I have experience in doing, but then again everything I have done over the last three years has been outside of my “scope” of experience.

Up to this point, I never considered myself to be a creative person; but, as I look at my website and a finished baby book, I realize I am sort of creative.  Also, I didn’t envision myself as an entrepreneur, but I can’t think of anything else to call someone who has created his or her own business.   I knew nothing about technology or how to build a web-based business, but I have managed to ask the right people and do enough research so that I could bring My Own Little Story to life.  Now, I am going to teach myself something about marketing and public relations.  I guess in the near future, I might have to hire someone if I want it done right.  In the meantime time, I am going to harness my passion for my product and see who will share my enthusiasm

I hope that my readers will take a look at my website you can click here: www.MyOwnLittleStory.com.  There are some really cool features of My Own Little Story that have never been done before on a baby book site. Email reminders of important milestones, the ability to omit questions and pages so they don’t appear in the final version of your child’s story.  For example, if you used a surrogate or adopted your child, you might not want the page that describes all about where you travelled while you were in my belly.   The hand-painted watercolors created by Devon Galusha are timeless and adorable.  Check out our baby onesies, gift vouchers and stationery.  They make great gifts for friends that are expecting.

If any of you reading this have had a small itch to start your own business or float a concept- I hope you will contact me.   I can be your cheering section or even share some of the mistakes I made.  Maybe you can avoid the same pitfalls!

I am typing this message up at the end of the day- Mother’s Day, feeling exhausted and somewhat lazy.  On that note, I am going to wrap up my blog. I hope that anyone who is reading this had a wonderful day being honored and cherished.  Thanks to each one of you for your support throughout the two years I have been blogging.

Today I learned how to do a flip on the trampoline.  I didn’t quite land it and I also of pulled a muscle in my neck from the whiplash of over-rotating; but it was pretty impressive (at least my kids enjoyed it).   It got me to thinking of some of the crazy  things I have learned since becoming a mom over eight years ago.

I have learned how to use the restroom in 15 seconds flat- including washing hands.

I have learned how to play with light sabers.

I am undefeated  at head-stand contests.

I have learned that pretending to be magic can pull a child out of a tantrum 9 times out of 10.  It’s amazing that my youngest still believes I performing magic whenever he is on the ground crying.

I learned that there is no such thing as peace and quiet;  but, I sort of like loud and chaotic.

I have learned that, no matter what, little boys ALWAYS find passing gas funny- especially while they are sitting on your lap (yesterday Cade told Brad, “Daddy, tickle me till I fart.”  Gross.

I have learned there is no such thing as a day off from parenting.  Even if you are on vacation, you are still worrying about the kids and how they are doing.

I learned that every mother carries some sort of mommy guilt around for something they wish they did differently or better.

I have learned that being a mom is one of the hardest jobs in the world, but worth every minute.

The swim was not in the ocean, and there was no threat of sharks- but I did manage to swim 3/4 of a mile in a freezing cold, somewhat disgusting lake in the midst of 100 other feet and bodies kicking and bumping me.  As the gun went off, I dove in and started strong (that lasted about 15 seconds).  After getting kicked and jostled my goggles were full of murky lake water and I lost my breath from putting my face in the cold water.  Fifty yards from the shore I started treading water, looking at the bouy in the distance and thinking: this is not going to happen.  Then I thought of my hours of swimming in the pool and started to convince myself that I could go the distance, I just needed to get myself situated.  I wasted about 4-5 minutes treading water, floating on my back and trying to get my goggles back in order.

I took one more look up at the buoy in the distance and put my head down and tried again.  One stroke at a time I saw myself getting closer and closer to the turning point. Just when I was gaining confidence, the men caught up to us old gals and once again I was thrown off by bodies and feet everywhere.  I had to clear my head one more time and find a rhythm that I could maintain.  I ended up breathing every other stroke rather than every three strokes.  I had to let go of my fear and just get busy moving forward.

I got out of the water in 29 minutes.  I have to admit I was pretty proud of myself once I was back on solid ground.  Once I got settled on my bike, the reality of my accomplishment in the water set in:  I can be a swimmer, I am a swimmer.  I realize many people swim greater distance all the time.  And, in the scope of life, this was just a swim- not like saving someone’s life or finding the cure to cancer.  Tucked away in each and every person is a little voice that says “I wish I could do _____.”  You feel in the blank.  I am here to tell you that you can do it.  It might require hard work or take a while to do, but you can do it.  You just have to get started.

Pacific Ocean here I come!

Even if we can’t imagine life without plenty of water, there are literally billions of people around the world that face this reality EVERY day.  I had the pleasure of meeting a woman, Kristen Kosinski, who created The Samburu Project that has already helped over 20,000 Kenyans gain access to clean water.  When I heard about Kristen, a million questions raced through my head: How did she get started on this mission?  Why did she chose Africa and where does she find the strength to keep this project going after giving birth to a son who is now almost two years old?

Kristen and I met at her office in Venice, a small space in the back of a local church.  The office is small and she shares it with three others. Her personality filled up the room and my initial impression is that this is a gal who isn’t afraid of much.  Kristen, and her 9 brothers and sisters, grew up outside of Pittsburgh  in what she describes as a conservative family.  As a young girl, she recollects she had visions of herself in Africa, surrounded by natives in colorful dress.  When asked why, she says it is hard to put a finger on the answer.  The best explanation she can think of is her fondness for the volumes of National Geographic that her grandfather used to share with her.

As Kristen grew up, she has countless recollections of her strong desire to travel to Africa.  However, she had no means for pursuing her dream because she was young and didn’t have the resources to realize her dream.  She attended college and after graduation became a teacher for Teach for America, an organization committed to eliminating education inequity in low-income communities.  She was placed in Houston and taught fifth grade for the next two years; then, moved to Los Angeles to teach for another year.  After working with Teach for America, she wasn’t sure what her next pursuit would be, but after talking to one of her brothers she secured an interview for a job with a casting director in the area.  Before long, she was completely entrenched in the entertainment industry and all of the excitement that Hollywood has to offer.  As her career progressed she joined Paramount and oversaw programming for some of the most popular shows on television including:  JAG, Becker and Girlfriends.  She worked with and incredible group of people and had a boss that could only be described as amazing.

In early 2005 there was a shake-up in the executive ranks of Paramount (which was owned by Viacom).  Shortly thereafter, several of Kristen’s colleagues were let go- including the boss who guided her career for years.  The manner in which this turn of events transpired caused Kristen to do some deep thinking.  Was her job on the line? Even if she wasn’t let go immediately, would she spend her prime years committed to company that might find her dispensible?  As her most current employment contract neared the end of it’s term, she planned a trip to Africa.  At the time she wasn’t sure if her contract would be renewed or if she would be let go.  But in her fearless manner, she booked the trip anyway and continued to negotiate her contract.  As the company came back to her several times, she found herself in a tough position: take the contract and play it safe or stand her ground and risk losing everything.  She stood her ground and the contract was not renewed.  In the back of her mind was that nagging feeling that she needed to move on with her life.  Something was pulling her to Africa and she was interested to find out what it was.

The way Kristen explained the culmination of her ten year career was that on Friday, June 19th, 2005 she had a farewell lunch with her co-workers, packed the last of her belongings; and,  by dinnertime she had boarded a plane on her way to Kenya for three months.   A short wave of panic washed over her as she asked, “What I am doing?”    While she did have a game plan (a driver to pick her up at the airport and a place to stay) she wasn’t sure where her journey would take her emotionally.  She knew she wanted to find a purpose in Africa- she just wasn’t sure what it would be.

She arrived near the gates of The Samburu Game Reserve and met a woman named Rebecca.  Rebecca was the leader of a woman’s group called an “Umoja”- a group of women who have left or been cast out of their villages.  Rebecca was well versed in English and was able to communicate with Kristen that she was all about empowering the women of Africa.  Kristen couldn’t believe her good fortune.  It was almost as if some universal force had brought her and Rebecca together.  With Rebecca by her side, Kristen was introduced to countless African women that shared their stories of life, survival, tragedgy and triumph.  The one theme that perisisted through almost every story Kristen heard, was the lack of clean drinking water.  Since the women of the villages spend a majority of their day walking to find water there is no time for income generating activity  And, along those same lines, the daughters who help their mothers in the quest for water are left with not time for education.  The water that they do encounter is often filled with bacteria and disease as these watering holes are shared with wild animals who deficate in the vacinity.  Illness and death run rampant among the villagers- both children and adults suffer equally.  Kristen learned the only way to solve this problem is to drill wells in order to reach the water table that is 70 Meters below the Earth’s surface.

Sitting in my home, typing this blog it is hard for me to imagine that there are people living in such dire circumstances.  I think about it for about 24 hours then I get on with my life.  Kristen Kosinski is different.  She decided that she would not come home and put the experience behind her.  She knew she had to take action.  Even if she was only able to impact a handful of people, she was going to seize the opportunity do as much as she could.

Mid-September, Kristen flew back to Los Angeles.  She hit the ground running, she filed documents to create charitable organization within weeks of her return.  She hosted her first fundraiser in October, another in April and was able to raise approximately $65,000 within a year.   During her year back in Los Angeles, she survived on her savings and spent countless hours researching how to drill a well and calling Africa to find professionals who could help her complete her project.  Initially, she  estimated that it would cost $2,000 to drill each well,  but she quickly learned the cost was closer to $10,000 (her first small setback).  She stayed in contact with Rebecca, who was all set to help her oversee the drilling.  Almost one year to the day, Kristen flew back to Africa to oversee her first well drill.  Upon arrival, she found that Rebecca had vanished (her second small setback).  She proceeded to meet with the company she had contracted to drill her wells, only to find out that their organization was not competent enough to complete the project (deal breaker).

So, here she is in Africa, without her main contact and without a drilling company.  Thank goodness for Plan B.  She had been in talks with a 2nd well driller who was unwilling to make a deal until they met face to face.  As a last resort, Kristen called on this company and was able to negotiate a last minute deal.  She explains that the actual process of drilling a water well is surreal.  First, a geologist does his reasearch to find a water table, then drilling rig is directed to the ideal location, the rig revs up its engine as the drill bit digs into the earth- within an hour water is spraying up out of the hole and an all out celebration ensues: dancing, singing, laughing and celebration.  A resource that has eluded these villagers for hundreds of years is now within reach.  Amazing.

The details that Kristen shared were inspiring- but I am running out of space and time.  Let me wrap up with some really important points.  World water day is March 22nd and Kristen is organizing a Walk for Water in the South Bay scheduled for March 21st.  I hope you all can participate.  You really should visit the website for The Samburu Project- www.TheSamburuProject.org and learn more about this amazing organization.  Finally, Kristen is a great example of the phrase “You are never too small to make a difference”.  I hope you will read her story and realize that anyone of us has the power to impact the world- your impact can be big or small- but every little bit helps.

1 TBS of Canola Oil

1 leek- white part only

1 white onion- chopped

1 small zucchini chopped

1 TBS of Arrobio rice (Or whatever rice you in your pantry)

2 cups of frozen petite green peas

3 cups of water

Directions:

Heat 1 TBS of Canola oil over medium heat, add leek, onion and zucchini- stir to coat with oil, reduce heat and let soften for 10 minutes.  Add 1 TBS of rice and 3 cups of water- raise heat to medium high and bring to a boil.  Reduce heat and simmer for 10 minutes.  Add peas and simmer for another 10 minutes.   Remove from heat and let stand for 15 minutes to cool.  Use an immersion blender or standing blender and carefully puree the soup.  I stirred in a pinch of salt and pepper to add flavor.  This makes about 4 servings.

Here are my goals for 2010.  I am going to try and make them fairly tangible so I can plan, set aside time and really realize my goals.

1.  I am going to set aside at least 5 hours a week to work on my blog/baby book business.  It doesn’t sound like a lot, but with one child who only goes to school three days a week and two older kids who need help with homework etc.  I feel that this is realistic number of hours for me to really commit.  I hope that I will do more than that, but I am going to schedule those hours into my calendar.

2.  I am going to continue to work on my swimming, so that I might get in the ocean for a swim during the spring/summer- without being paralyzed with fear. I will keep you all posted on my progress.

3. (This is my “intangible”) I am going to try and be more appreciative of the fact I get to stay home with my kids for now.  I have been really antsy to try and get back to work at some point.  Hopefully my new business will keep me busy enough that I will consider it my full-time job, but while I am waiting for the final product, I will really try to enjoy time with the kids and some free time while they are at school.

I would really like to hear some of your goals for 2010- resolutions are great too.  Just thinking about my goals and typing them out has gotten me fired up to stay true to them.